I haven’t been able to write anything aside from panado and antibiotics (etc) at work for a long while. I don’t know why. But I do know why. Final exams, work, burn out, chronic pain etc. Somehow, time just flies but at the same time, it also feels like it drags on in day to day life. You seldom stop to look behind you and see how far (or not- far) you’ve actually come. The rear view mirror is blurry and one day you wake up and decide to look over your shoulder.

Anyway,

I recently witnessed a transaction between 2 people that don’t really know each other and thought about the classic saying, first impressions are the last impressions. This sometimes rings true in life but especially true in medicine. Sometimes, all you have is one interaction with a person and that defines you in the next person’s mind. That interaction is who you are forever more.

The medical world seems big and vast but actually it’s quite small. People know people who know people who know people and that ‘people’ usually includes you along the line. The problem is people know ‘of you’ like so and so is a doctor and worked at so and so hospital etc. But people within medicine don’t truly KNOW who you are as a person because there’s simply no time. Medicine feels like an identity but I guess that happens when you spend over 80% of your time and by default your life working toward it, around it or within it.

Who are you?
I am a doctor. Fullstop. No spaces for comas.

Anyway

The 2 people who did not know each other well and belonged to 2 different specialities were at each other’s throat, so to speak. They were both arguing about the patients admission area post emergency surgery. I was an innocent bystander with 2 sisters and an intern, watching the situation unfold.

The first person was obviously right. The second person was obviously wrong.

The patients primary pathology belonged to the second doctors specialization and the first doctor was consulted for an incidental finding of a pathology that also needed intervention. Therefore, the patient needed to be admitted to the second doctors ward to be managed by their team.

They both refused to admit the patient to their wards. They exchanged heavy words and the vibes were aggravating by the second.

I tried to get a word in, no one cared.
“Guys, the patient can stay here in the interim area until there’s a bed” I tried to help.

They were hell bent on making each other accept the patient. It became a matter of principle to each of them. But one of them was right and the other wrong.

“You can scream and shout until you pop a hemorrhoid. There is no space for this patient in our ward”
I almost laughed.
The first doctor (the right one) stormed off and muttered something about the consultant will be hearing about this.

The second doctor (the wrong one) stormed after him. I don’t know what became of the situation as I left soon after that.

The patient was accepted by one of their wards and eventually left.

A few weeks later, a patient once again with double pathology presented and needed dual surgery. Patients don’t stop getting sick just because your colleagues are being difficult. The show must go on with or without poor attitudes.

I informed the sister in the area that we would be admitting a patient post operatively.

She looked at me, wide eyed.

“Haai dokter! Daai twee rude mense….. causing drama vir ons….”

And I just thought that’s so sad.

All they were in that moment was 2 rude people who were now known for causing scenes.

No MBCHB, FCPAED, FCanything. Just rude people without tact and any sense of professionalism. No one cared who’s right or wrong.

Made me think that if you have limited capability and time to know a person, all you think of them is based on what they show you.

Patients meet us for the first and sometimes, last time. A dying patient. A pre-terminal patient. A critically ill pre anesthetic patient who arrests on the table.

Imagine hearing that conversation post operatively.

Our face is their last sight. Our voice is the last sound. Our hands are the last touch.

I hope we give them something healing to begin and end with.

A smile. A kind word. A gentle hand.

Hopefully…. we won’t just be 2 rude doctors to the people who actually matter the most,

our patients.